I didn’t start this to say I’m perfect!!

When I first thought about doing this site, I had to really keep going over it in my head which honestly is dangerous, but after speaking to people most people thought it was a great way to raise awareness for FASD, mental health, alcoholism and domestic abuse from the man’s point of view. At no time was it to make me look like I’m the best human and dad there has ever been, cos I’m not and no one is no matter how spiritual, righteous or religious they are. I have made a ton of mistakes in my life; I have treated people like shit some who cared about me. I have hurt people in many different ways and a lot of them things I can truly hand on heart and say I’m sorry I wish I had handled things differently.

Late on Friday night I had someone contact me though the site stating just a few of my mistakes, they didn’t leave their real name or contact details but from how bitter the email was I have a very good idea who they are. I’m sorry if me talking about my family life and past offends anyone but I’m doing it to help my life move on and improve as a person for my kids and I hope that you can move on in time.

One of the things he brought up was the fact of my sons, who it breaks my heart to say that I don’t get to see and I hadn’t talked about them as of yet because when you split up with someone and it ends badly its hard to talk about the kids without saying something bad about your ex and I’m not here to do that because I know that me doing that even if I wanted to would ruin any chance of have of my sons ever wanting a relationship with me and meeting their sisters. All I will say is that there is two sides to every story and lies that were told were said to have been lies in court which is why I was given joint custardy of them and it was court ordered that those lies can never be said again but I left it there I should have had it put in the order that they had to be righted in public not just in court papers. I am not attacking anyone, I just wanted to say why I haven’t brought them up. The fact it kills me every day how much I miss them, and I love them with all my heart, and I will always be here if they ever want me.

I have been lied to many times by people saying they are pregnant, or they have had my baby while they want stuff from me for them to just turn round after they get what they want or I know they are lying for them to just turn around and say the baby isn’t yours, I lost the baby. I even had an ex tell me that she had lost the baby and the hospital said that she couldn’t have kids now 8 weeks later she was pregnant again, exes and it does go both ways I am very aware of bad things I have done but we just crazy lol.

But I will end this by saying I’m trying to be the best dad I can be and I’m sorry to the ones I can’t be that to, but I love you

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